Chief sports reporter Neil Farrington has brought us some classic junk over the years, linking Newcastle with everyone from Beckham to Henry; Rooney to Messi.
So what Christmas exclusive has he dished up with the turkey with weekend?
Brace yourself ... "REAL MADRID are weighing up a shock January move for Newcastle defender Fabricio Coloccini".
Neil Farrington: "The Bernabeu giants are urgently seeking a new central defender after Portuguese stopper Pepe was ruled out for the season with cruciate ligament damage.
"And Coloccini is on a shortlist of possible targets after recently rediscovering the form which made his reputation in Spain."
"And although a link with Madrid may sound absurd to some, Coloccini’s reputation in Spain – forged during four years at Deportivo and earlier spells at Alaves, Atletico Madrid and Villarreal – remains intact."
ABSURD TO SOME?
Coming from anyone else, yes it would ... but coming from the Sunday Sun ... it's no worse that the rest of the shite they print in that newspaper.