The Sun: We got Tyneside's top paranormal investigators to look into why the Toon is currently pure doom and gloom.
And after specialist ghoul hunters Alone in the Dark Entertainment had worked their magic, all was clear.
Curses expert Trevor Brown declared: "Curses are all about negative thoughts.
"You can sense the atmosphere. And when you have 50,000 thinking the same thing, that is the outcome.
"It is like a whirlwind of negative energy. But as soon as Mike Ashley leaves and Kevin Keegan comes back, the whole thing will turn around." After probing the situation with infrared thermometers and electro-magnetic field meters, Brown added: "If you hate something so much and you keep thinking it, that negative energy will take over.
"It is possible the club is cursed right now. But it will lift once the thought patterns change. If the right man comes in, it could go overnight.
"People used to say Sunderland were cursed. They got some bloke to do a blessing — and they didn't go down last season, so maybe it worked."
The area around St James' Park was used centuries ago to hang witches, while regular ghost hunts are carried on weekly throughout the city.
Brown declared: "There have been so many supporters who have loved Newcastle. The good spirits will always be there.
"But those spirits need to be lifted though to make everyone realise how proud they are of the club."