ROY KEANE'S TOP FIVE BATTLES
1 The Highbury tunnel affair Who hasn’t wanted to taunt prissy footballing shop steward Gary Neville mercilessly at some point? Patrick Vieira, captain of Arsenal, just couldn’t help himself before Tuesday night’s encounter with Manchester United at Highbury. As the teams waited in the tunnel before the match, Vieira taunted the United full-back about what experts the world over have agreed was “something or other”. As you might expect, this all proved too much for our brave hero Roy. Eyes blazing, he took it upon himself to fight Neville’s battle for him. “Vieira is 6ft 4in and was having a go at Gary,” explained Keane. “So I said, ‘Have a go at me’. If he wants to intimidate our players and thinks that Gary is an easy target, I’m not having it.” As a fearful Vieira blinked, referee Graham Poll quickly moved in to save the day. Before a ball had been kicked, Keane had won the game.
2 Mick McCarthy With his heavy Yorkshire accent and reluctance to pander to players’ egos, Ireland manager McCarthy was always going to be on a collision course with his star. It all came to a head at the Irish training camp in Saipan before the last World Cup. Keane made his grievances clear in an interview with The Irish Times, and then McCarthy rounded on him. The move backfired spectacularly. “I didn’t rate you as a player,” Keane told him in front of the whole squad. “I don’t rate you as a manager and I don’t rate you as a person. You can stick the World Cup up your b*******.”
3 Alf-Inge Haaland September 1997. Keane commits a savage foul on Leeds United’s Alf-Inge Haaland. Not only is the Manchester United midfielder booked, but he is also carried off with a ruptured cruciate ligament and misses the rest of the season. The whole business, he muses for four brooding years, was Haaland’s fault. Fast-forward to April 2001. Keane faces Haaland — now of Manchester City — once more. Five minutes from time, Keane fells Haaland with an inhuman lunge that is more assault than tackle. Keane is sent off. After bragging about it in his autobiography (“I f****** hit him hard”), Keane is fined £150,000 and banned for five games.
4 Prawn-sandwich eaters In November 2000, after a Champions League victory over Dynamo Kiev, it was Keane’s turn to make small talk with journalists. Only small talk is not his thing. Instead, he berated the fans at Old Trafford: “Away from home our fans are fantastic, but at home they’ve had a few drinks and probably their prawn sandwiches and don’t realise what is going on out on the pitch. ” Naturally, he felt not so much misquoted as misunderstood. He wasn ’t having a go at corporate junketeers, you see, but “United fans in general”. As in the people who pay his wages. A career in the diplomatic service awaits upon retirement, Mr Keane.
5 Alan Shearer Perhaps Keane’s equal in sheer bloody-mindedness, Alan Shearer’s superior self-control usually meant he had the upper hand when they locked horns. In September 2001, as United lost 4-3 at St James’ Park, Shearer prevented Keane from taking a throw-in. Keane threw the ball at Shearer, who called the Irishman a “prick”. Keane then tried to strike the striker, and Shearer pulled away leaving Keane to swing at fresh air ... but it earned the Irishman a dismissal in the process. Keane said in his book: "I wish I had connected!", Shearer said his HIS book: "He couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo!"